I hope they don't...

More and more each day I hope my little girls don't want to find their birthmom when they get older. I think they will be in such a depression and hurt over it. I don't ever want to see my girls go through that.
When we got called back in April to adopt their baby brother, I was so happy for the contact with their birthmom. She cried and cried on the phone to me that she had moved and had no way to get any letters or pictures from us for 2 years yadda yadda. She also mentioned that her oldest daughter was a runaway (I actually knew this because while googling her name and daughters name for a way to contact her, I found her oldest on the Missing & Exploited Children's website) ::insert eye roll::
I never went into much thought, other than oh my gosh she really had no way to see her precious babies because anything I would have sent her, she wouldn't get.
YEAH RIGHT
I have come to find, she is totally full of b.s. You see, back in 2012 when we purchased a house, we contacted the adoption agency because it was Noelani's 2nd birthday, we had just moved and I misplaced her address. I wanted to be able to send an update to her so I asked the agency to outreach to confirm/give me her address. She right away confirmed her address with them that time. So....now that I don't have blinders on, I know that she was blowing smoke because there was 2 years of time she could have contacted that agency and gave them her new address. SO FULL OF IT.
I completely opened my arms and heart, EVERYTHING to this woman and invited her to be in my life....no, let me correct that....my GIRLS lives. She hasn't done....for lack of a better word....SHIT to be around. She dismisses and ignores ALL of my text messages. She ignores ALL of my FB messages to her about updates of the girls. She is a piece of work, let me tell you. I don't even want to hear the crap about oh it's so hard for her, blah blah blah. It's a bunch of bull. I have access to her FB page, only because it is public for now....and she accidentally sent her FB name to me through our original contact of pictures. Her entire FB is filled with drugs, alcohol, partying. No type of mother for a brand new baby. It really angers me inside. It angers me that someday my girls will look for her and this is who they will find. UGH!!!!!
I used to always talk such a high image of her. Lately it makes me mad inside when the girls talk about her so lovingly. I just want to scream out loud at the top of my lungs and say "I'm so friggen sorry I let you girls believe she was such a good person....because she isn't". UGH UGH UGH.
I sent her message after message all but begging her to respond. I've sent her probably HUNDREDS of pictures of the girls and she never responds. No "oh that's cute", "thanks for sending" NOTHING. I don't know if I should continue sending them or just forget it and let her find out who they are when they are 18 someday and want to see who she is...which will be a disappointment.
A day before my little ones 4th birthday I sent her a long message with pictures. That day I sent her more pictures and told her about her day. She doesn't even open half of the messages. But, she definitely makes time to go on FB talking about her partying and how she hates everyone in the world around her and all about her money. So pathetic.
Oh and the daughter? Well out of her oh 7 facebooks I think i've found.....she is the spitting image of her mother. Drugs, sex, partying, all of it.
Yet again, another reason why I took that failed placement SO hard. I know that this little baby boy is in for the same type of life. Makes me sick.