How did we get here?

HOW did this happen?! Everyone wants to know!!!! I am just as shocked as everyone who is about to read this!!!
As everyone now knows, Antoine & I worked very hard all summer to become foster parents. We just got the green light...and since Antoine works for the agency as a counselor in their group homes, he needed a special piece of paper signed. This paper was given the green light and signed by the director this past Tuesday. It is in the midst of being transferred to the foster care office. Our social worker is currently on vacation until Tuesday.
With that being said, knowing we are going to be foster parents, I've been collecting items for potential children who may enter our home. My biggest thing was clothing. Alot of children come in to care with nothing.On Friday am, as I was driving to work, I saw a garage sale. I kicked myself in the butt because as I passed by I saw TONS of little kid/girl stuff. I just told myself "well, I guess on lunch I will stop by". Lunch time rolled around, and before I went there, I stopped and sold a pair of Noelani's old curtains to someone I worked with. SO I thought well I will just limit myself to this $10 and not bother running to the bank. Off I went to the garage sale with my $10. When I got there, I saw a table of girls clothing. I kind of looked quickly, and noticed it said "$5 for everything on the table". I thought - WELL, even if I only keep 5 things from this pile, its worth it. So the guy asked if I had a girl the size of the clothing, and I said "no, just picking them up for foster kids"....he said "WOW thats great, you are a saint for doing that...I tell ya what, see all of that stuff over there? If you want you can have everything $10". The other table had 4 bins under it and another pile and a box. I left that garage sale with my back seat and trunk STUFFED with 6 boxes of baby clothes up to size 7/8 for $10!
I ran to McDonalds (yuk GAG) - since it was right around the corner and I had to FLY back to work. When I got back to work, I told the 4 ladies I work with about the great deal on the clothes I just got. They were all shocked and thought it was awesome. Next thing I knew, I approached my desk to charge my phone and noticed I had THREE missed calls and a voicemail. Funny I thought. My intial thought was that it was Walgreens or Target leaving me a message that SOMEONE in our family had medication to be picked up. For some reason, they always have auto systems that have out of area phone numbers. THEN it hit me.....WAIT....this is SPENCE CHAPIN CALLING (Noelanis adoption agency)!
I have to say, my blood from my body felt like it drained at that very moment. Everyone knows I long for an open adoption, and to have Spence Chapin calling - I just couldn't foresee good news. TRUTHFULLY I had flashes of them telling me something horrible happened to Noeys birthparents. For those 30 seconds (which felt like 45 minutes), as I was returning the agencies call, I had visions of how I was going to tell Noelani that she would never meet her birthmom because something happened. I got the workers voicemail. PANIC. This is NOT good I thought. I gained my composure and began leaving a message. WAIT I thought...maybe it's not so bad....maybe her BM just called Spence Chapin because we haven't sent her a letter and pics in a long time...SHAME on me I thought. She probably called and was upset and they are calling us to see why!!!!
Just as I was leaving the message, my cell phone rang. It was Spence Chapins worker - "Hi Jennifer...I'm calling you because I have some news about birthmom (keeping her name out of this in the blog post)" *(omg omg omg I thought...I can't believe it...it's bad news....something happened)*....I think everything stopped moving at that moment. The room stopped, and I couldn't even feel my heart beating.
The next words were...."she delivered a baby girl last week".....My response? "oh....MY......GOD"
It was that very moment, the 5 girls I worked with that day, all jumped and said "WHATS WRONG!!!!!" I proceeded to hear the social worker say "well, BM wanted us to call you and see if you are interested in adopting this baby"...."YES YES YES OF COURSE!!!!!!!!" Here I had the worked on the phone and i'm yelling to my supervisor "CALL ANTOINE!!!"
She called Antoine and as he later told me, he thought I was in a car accident (what is with us being so pessimistic!!!!). She said "I have news for you but hang on, Jenn has to tell you". The social workers talking in my ear, and I'm waving my supervisor on "tell him tell him!!!!"
She proceeds to tell me the baby has been in their "supervision/care" since she was 2 days old. She has jaundice and is being monitored. Shes a healthy 7lbs and 21". Same exact medical history as Noey of course.
She asks me if I have any questions....NONE. I don't have a single one. This baby could have 4 toes and be blind in one eye and we would still say yes. This is Noelanis SISTER. She belongs with her sister. There's only 2 options for this little girl. Our house or BM's....and BM has made the decision it won't be hers - not because she doesn't love her. Because she loves her THAT much to choose this for her. She gave her life. The biggest gift of all that I could never give this baby girl!!!!
So, when she asks if I had questions....my response was "NO....but can you relay a message to her for us?? I want you to tell her that we love her...we tell her this in our letters...but we really really love her....and if she wants to be there for placement we would love her to meet up with Noelani and meet her....and if she is not comfy at the agency, we can meet her at a park afterwards!!!!"
How fast can we get her?!! Well, it was about 1:57pm and Spence Chapin was closing for the weekend until Tuesday because of the labor day holiday. BM now has to sign paperwork to relinquish rights. Once all of that is done, and our current homestudy is sent, we can get her!!! In all reality and truth....it won't be until late this week, EARLY next. I was advised to call our foster care place, and see IF they would release the home study, and if so, was it ok for a private adoption.
I spent the next hour on the phone TRYING to get ahold of someone at that office. AGAIN everyone was gone on vacation. AHHHH I wanted to scream. I left 4 people voicemails, called and was transferred everywhere. Someone finally called me back....he said they wouldn't refuse transfer of it, but they need to speak to Spence Chapin and are not sure if it's good enough for private adoption. I now have an email out to our original social worker who did Noelanis home study. I am PRAYING that since our fingerprints and background stuff all was done, that somehow the two can be merged by the end of this week!!!!
So, now we wait until Tuesday am.....at 9:00 when both places open. To say we are on pins and needles is a MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR understatement.
Oh and does Noelani understand? WELL....we told her she was going to have a baby sister...she replied "I'm a BROTHER" lol!!!! Tonight we asked her what did she want to name the baby?.....We said, do you want her to have a similar name? "Yes daddy" she replied....he said "What do you want to name your sister?"....She replied "Chicken nugget". Guess we will have to work on that one...hahhahhaha!!

EDITED TO ADD:
Two things I wanted to add that I forgot. When I got home after work, I unloaded the boxes of clothes. As I sat on the kitchen floor going through them, I just said...WELL I guess I will be donating all of these to the foster agency....as I went through the boxes....there were baby girl clothing in there....0-3 months and 3-6 month clothing. CRAZY!!!!!
Ok, I lied....3 things to add. SECOND...tonight, I sat down to braid Noeys hair, and she asks if she can watch Dora. WELL, I turn on Nick Jr...and what episode starts? The "Dora's going to be a big sister" episode!!!!!
I believe in fate, and these are just signs to me!
LASTLY....I would like to put this out there. YES, I'm sure it may have crossed peoples minds. And, if it hasn't GOOD FOR YOU. BUT...NO Noelani's birthmom does NOT have some crazy life that prevents her from parenting. In fact, she HAS 4 children that she currently parents day in and day out. She does not have some wacky drug addiction or alcohol addiction as some people have so rudely asked me. She is a perfectly decent person from the information I have about her. She just does not have the means to take care of another child financially. THESE were her decisions.